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Thursday, January 5, 2012

Crash

I’ve got no witty anecdotes, no stories that effortlessly connect to one of the religious/cultural themes of this blog, no nothing. I’m suffering from a bad case of burn out, which I believe began about a year ago. In the past few months, I completely crashed, explaining my absence from the blogosphere (the details of this extreme collision will remain off the record of this blog because it isn’t completely anonymous). I wasn’t able to deal with much of anything besides for class and homework, and even then, I probably should have taken a semester off. I haven’t even checked my grades yet.

Burn out could not have arrived at a worse time – I’m being offered a shot at writing on a professional platform and I need to be in tip-top shape or I’ll lose the shot. Judging from my Microsoft Word archives, I haven’t produced anything of the quality I need to be producing now in over a year, pre-Arbitribe. What happened? People don’t just lose their abilities, do they? On top of this writer’s block, I’m musically blocked as well. My brain goes all fuzzy when I try to be creative, but I realize this isn’t sudden. I was in denial throughout the gradual build-up of the blockage.

I suppose I haven’t been taking the best care of myself, but then again, what college student can get eight hours of sleep every night and have time to regularly hit the gym and get those endorphins flitting about? But the body and mind are connected, of course, and if you starve one, the other suffers as well. Case in point: moi. I wrote over 150 pages this past semester, which took its toll on me. It’s true what they say, the body is a temple and if you keep it in good health, the mind will be kept clear.

A combination of academic stresses plus my own anxiety about life in general sent me spiraling down, down, down. I let go of taking care of my physical self, and damaged my soul. Now, I’ve really got no place to go but up.

I suppose I’ll be documenting my journey back to life here.

2 comments:

  1. *hugs* I"m sorry to hear that, Joanna. I don't know anything about professional writing platforms, but I've enjoyed reading your work here. Anything we can do to help?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for posting, despite your condition! Be well and may you find yourself connecting with "home" - related...

    http://beyondthefaceoffacebook.wordpress.com/2011/11/24/dear-chronic-daters-part-ii-my-new-home/

    ReplyDelete

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